Calling

Today I was tired. SOOOO tired. I made it thru work. I made it on the drive home.. I made it thru dinner. then I went to lay down and crashed. I kept tellin my self I'm going to church tonight and I was destined to go. Then I fell asleep. But you know whats so funny? God works in crazy ways. I was awoken to my friend Jett callin me at 6 for no reason just to say hi. I thought hey I'm up I should go... o wait no gas to drive. Momma let me take the car. SO I went to church and had the most amazing wake up call there. God wanted me there. I was feelin so alone. Like everyone in my life was fake or like I had abandoned the good ones. I was starting to feel like I was comin to the end, I was feelin really sad lately but tonight at service, God was like HEY! I'm here with you, I have been here silly lady! And I was so overwhelmed by it all that I just sat there and let the tears fall down. 2 years of real tears being held in came streamin down my face and I just let God hug me, take care of me there in that moment. No one around me mattered, no outside world mattered. It was just me, God and the pastor. Reminding me to push on. That there is so much more living I have to do. That I have a purpose and I'm getting really close to figuring it out. God is GOOD! and so loving. It sounds silly but the only way I ever want to express it is to go get like a million tattoos screaming Gods love for me and the world. Weird huh? lol. Untill then!